The first official one...

Haiz...is always the description written on my face that i can always start off my blogs ever since i started them. almost nothing has been the ups of my life and here comes another one. the only thing i can be more relieved about is that at least i finally step out my very first step in going face to face with u. although i know the result way before i ask, but i know that i must at least try, if not i will regret it, since u are going for such a long time.

It has been such a long time ever since i started running away from all these problems, ever since from that so called 'unsincerity' confession on the phone. i have been feeling ultimately inferior in myself since then, especially the way i express myself to others, which really leads me to only taking a fancy of someone i like secretly all these years. i'm not sure whether my friends around me knows it, but there are times that i thought juz stop thinking about it and maybe let it be. i may juz end up alone till the end of my life, considering the way i act when it comes to facing relationships. i'm saying all these not because i wanted some care and concern, but i juz wanted to let it out from deep within me. after all, it is my first official one, if i say i'm ok, i will be lying to everyone around me. i dun want anyone to worry about me, nor sudden care and concern from u guys. i will be alright!!! and may u enjoy your trip! we are still friends though. as for the rest of u, maybe can still ask me out for a drink or something, haha, of course not about this. but it has to be my treat.